From South Bend, Indiana
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Randy "Macho Man" Savage narrates footage of George "The Animal" Steele, um, stealing Elizabeth, then interfering at Wrestlemania III. Ricky Steamboat defends his intercontinental championship for the first time tonight against Hercules. The Harts will give those crybaby British Bulldogs a rematch. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan isn't going to let that commie Nikolai Volkoff sing the Russian national anthem. Bobby Heenan is going to show the footage of how Andre the Giant beat Hulk Hogan. "I am the champion!" the giant says. Hulk will show us, exclusively on SNME, how he beat the greatest challenge of his career.
They show footage from "earlier today" of Ken Patera beating up Heenan, explaining his neck brace. I'm guessing that aired in some markets on Superstars earlier that day, though I for instance wouldn't have seen it until Sunday.
"Mean" Gene Okerlund talks to Mr. Fuji, the new manager of Kamala. "I will help Kamala!"
Kamala vs. Jake "The Snake" Roberts- We see footage from the Snake Pit of the Honky Tonk Man breaking a guitar over Jake's head. Gene then gets scared by Damian, who also makes Kamala jump and run when Jake dumps him out in the ring. As Jake puts Damian away Kamala attacks from behind, and kicks Jake in the midsection. Jake pounds away, but Kamala chops him in the throat. Kamala grabs a bearhug. Jake gets free, and stomps on Kamala's feet. Kamala drops him with a chop to the head, and chokes away on the mat. Kamala chokes him on the bottom rope. Kim Chee shouts orders to the Ugandan, but Jake uppercuts Kamala. A headbutt from the giant drops Jake, and he hends up chasing the snake around the ring. Jake kneelifts him coming back in, then hits one off the top rope. Kim Chee attacks with the ref distracted, and Kamala hits a big splash for the win. *1/2. Kim Chee thens unmasks/undresses to reveal Honky, with his jumpsuit under the Kim Chee suit. He gives Jake Shake, Rattle and Roll. Jesse acting like Honky's always been Kim Chee is pretty funny.
We see WMIII footage of Hulk and Andre entering.
Another fucking George Steele vs. Randy Savage match here. The Bulldogs and Hart Foundation are jawing at each other from their lumberjack positions.
Savage vs. Animal- It's possible this drew money as a house show main event, and I know it kind of led to Savage-Steamboat at WMIII, but my God I hate this pairing. At least when WCW had the same match on every Clash for a year it was the Southern Boys (Young Pistols) vs. the Freebirds. It was better than it sounds. Steamboat's in George's corner, natch. Savage tells dream he's the true I-C champion. What a waste of prime Savage to have him face Steele over and over. Herc and Steamboat get into it, previewing their matchup later. Savage is wearing a robe from perhaps his first few months in the company. Savage jumps George, but gets hiptossed. Savage goes out to the heel side. The faces come and throw him in. Savage whips him to the buckles. Steele bites Savage. Faces toss him back in every time. George gets tied in the ropes and elbowed, but when he falls out the faces gently toss him in. Punchy kicky, then Savage hits an axehandle. He throws Steele out, and the heels work him over. Duggan then chases them away, and chases Sheik and Volkoff through the ring. Duggan finally gets ejected. Danny Davis cheapshot Steele, then gets knocked on his keister by George. George rips open the buckle and tosses it in Savage's face, but Macho suplexes him. George goes out and Steamboat helps him in. Steamboat then immediately tosses Randy back in. A second time Savage and Hercules fight with Steamboat, and Davis whallops George with the bell in the ring. Savage then drops the elbow. -* The good news is that I think this was the blowoff, and was supposed to transition to Davis-Steele. Things degenerate into a battle royal with the night's participants, and Jake runs in with Damian, who he eventually puts on Kim Chee (the real one).
Now it's conspiracy theory time. Heenan tells Okerlund the refs are always biased toward Hogan. He has footage showing Andre beating Hogan. It's of course the failed slam attempt where Andre falls on Hulk. He demands an investigation, now. "I know I'm the world champion," Andre says.
WWF tag team championship, Hart Foundation (c) vs. British Bulldog- Gene talks to the Harts before the match. Danny Davis tries to attack Gene for insuating he wasn't on the up and up. Matilda attacked Jimmy, and it looked like he fell on her after he was bitten. Somebody call Sarah McLaughlin! Davey starts with Bret, who works the arm. Davey reverses and lifts him, then works on the arm. Hart headlocks him on the mat. Davey leapfrogs, then does a monkey flip. Davey armbars him, does a crucifix off the ropes for two. Bret knees him in the gut, and tags the Anvil. Neidhart lifts Davey by the hair, and punches him in the gut. Anvil forearms Davey's back, and the Harts doubleteam him in the corner. Hart backbreaks Davey, then legdrops him. Davey gets whipped from pillar to post, but kicks Bret. He tags Kid, and Bret takes his sternum bump. Kid picks Bret up by the hair, and a clothesline gets two. A snap suplex gets two. The Anvil runs in, and throws Davey to Davis. Tito Santana chases Davis around the ring, and the bell rings. Santana pushes them off of Kid. The Bulldogs win the first fall by disqualification.
Second fall- Bret rams Dynamite into Anvil's boot. Anvil works him over, and they do the Demolition Decapitation, which gets two. Kid gets cut off from the tag. Anvil gets the tag and cuts off one to the Kid. Bret kicks Davey and they chase outside, while Anvil chokes and bites the Kid. Hart cheapshots Kid, then gets tapped. He charges at a tied-up Kid, but he moves. Finally the Kid tags Davey. He elbows Anvil off the ropes and dropkicks him. Lariat gets 2.5. A War and Peace suplex gets two. Anvil kicks Davey coming off of the ropes. They doubleteam, but Anvil wallops Hart. Davis gets on the apron, but Tito runs across and nails him. Davey picks up Kid and drops him on Anvil for the win. *** HOWEVER, as Jesse points out, there was a disqualification in the first fall, so there's no title change. Except, of course, when Demolition were involved two years later. And again the following year.
Gene with Hulk. He was telling the "Andre was 800 pounds and died the next day" lies yet at this point. We only see the match-ending slam as a still photo.
WWF intercontiental championship, Hercules vs. Ricky Steamboat (c)- This is Steamboat's first title defense. I feel like I should search for more defenses, or even squash matches from Steamboat's title reign. I feel like I've only seen this one, and the loss to Honky Tonk. Savage tells "Mean" Gene he wants to be the one to take the title. They lock up to begin, and Steamboat chops away. Herc hammers on him, but Steamboat gets a pair of dropkicks. Herc tumbles outside, and Ricky chases and chops him. Atomic drop, and Herc rolls back in. Herc rams Steamboat into the turnbuckles, and stomps away. Macho is watching and cheering for Steamboat. Herc clotheslines the Dragon, and drops an elbow for two. Steamboat starts a comeback, and uses more chops. Herc uppercuts him but gets rammed to the buckle. Steamboat hits a Shake, Rattle and Roll(!) for two. Herc then gets the full nelson, and Savage runs out and grabs Herc's ankle. Herc goes up but hits knees. Herc slams him but misses an elbow. More choppery from the Dragon, and he seemingly gets his special. That results in more chops, but Herc atomic drops him. Herc then chokes Steamboat with his chain, for the DQ. *1/2. Savage jaws at Herc and Heenan as they leave, and then he enters the ring. Dave Hebner tries to keep him away from Steamboat, but he just wants to check on his condition. Savage acts like he's leaving, then drops the elbow. Tremendous.
Gene with "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan. He loves the U.S.A., and hates anyone who doesn't. I think he'd fit in just fine in Trump-merica in 2017.
Can-Am Connection vs. Sheik/Volkoff- both of these teams would have members swapped out by October, though I guess new teams were just created. As Volkoff sings Duggan runs in and whacks him with the 2x4. How not letting someone singing their national Anthem makes this the land of the free, I don't know. Jesse then says the exact same thing. Martel gets a dropkick. Tom Zenk leapfrogs Sheik and they double hiptoss him. Sheik bicks him coming off of the ropes, and rams Zenk to Volkoff's boot. A suplex gets two. Another gets two. Why is Sheik in yellow trunks, instead of his long blue tights? Nikolai also is wearing his striped trunks again. If not for Duggan and the Can-Ams being there, I'd think this match was taped two years earlier. Sheik gets an abdominal stretch, but Zenk breaks it. Sheik gets a running clothesline, and tosses Zenk out. They throw Martel out too, and work Zenk over in front of Duggan. Hacksaw meanaces Sheik with the 2x4, and with Duggan in the ring Martel rolls up Sheik for the pin. Not sure about that one. * Slick and his team then work Duggan over. The faces then clear the ring.
I liked the tag title match (and I've seen it many times over the years), but I didn't like most of the rest. At the time, the Hogan-Andre stuff was interesting because the thought of a rematch was enticing. But fuck the Savage-Steamboat series.
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