Hulk gives a promo behind a steel cage wall, and basically runs through the same "judge, jury and executioner" stuff he did a few episodes ago. And we go right into the intro.
From Des Moines, Labor Day weekend 1989. There will be three title matches. We see the ending of the Ultimate Warrior-"Ravishing" Rick Rude Intercontinental championship match at Wrestlemania V. Bobby "the Brain" Heenan says they didn't break Rule #1- "Just win baby," Rude says.
WWF Intercontinental championship, Rick Rude vs. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan- Fuck the Network for changing Rude's music to similar-sounding stripper music. What about his WCW "Simply Ravishing" theme? Duggan, looking especially stupid wearing a crown with his tongue sticking out, says he's proud to be red, white and blue, but he says Rude seems a little pink to him. Ugh. He's going to keep one eye on Heenan, and one on Old Glory. Duggan gets carried out on the throne that Haku and Race previously used, as he beat Haku for the crown. As Duggan plays with his cape Vince says he looks like Batman, while Jesse says he looks like Count Dracula. At least Randy Savage revamped the uniform when he beat DUggan. They lock up and roll around on the top rope. Rude then punches and forearms him, but gets punched on an atomic drop attempt. Duggan then clotheslines him over the top. Duggan suplexes him back in for two. Duggan gets three clotheslines, and Rude falls on his face. Duggan slams him and drops a knee for two. Rude headbutts his midsection and hits a forearm, and catches Duggan coming in in the corner. Rude goes up and hits Duggan in the face. Jesse notes that Rude can't lose the I-C title here; it's printed on his tights. Duggan gets an atomic drop, which always seems to hurt Rude the most. Hmmm. Duggan piledrives Rude, which I've never seen him do. Rude got his foot on the rope, and Haku comes out trying to take the crown. If you've been playing at home, you know this leads to a commercial break. When we return, Duggan is marching on the apron like a moron wearing the crown, and Rude, recovered, attacks him. Rude hits a dropkick, necksnap and drops elbows. Rude shoulders Duggan in the corner, and drops an elbow for two. Rude gets a chinlock with his forearms over Duggans face. Duggan gets free, but Rude hits him with a knee coming off of the ropes. Rude goes up for a fistdrop. He mugs for the camera, then rams the moron's head to the buckle to predictable results. Duggan no sells a bunch of forearms, and pounds away. Duggan gets a big baaaack bodydrop. He hits the three-point stance clothesline, knocking Rude to the floor. The big dummy counts along with the ref, apparently not realizing he won't get the title. ** I'm sorry, I found Duggan especially irritating here. And what is with them booking patriotic wrestlers to beat champions by countout?
Gene talks to Jim Neidhart. He has the unfortunate task of facing the Macho Man. He hates Savage, and he has to go through the Anvil to get a shot at Hulk Hogan's championship.
Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart vs. Randy "Macho Man" Savage- Jesse talks to Macho Man and Sensational Sherri. He's going after Hogan after getting through the Anvil. Sherri says Liz is no wrestler, and certainly is no lady. How the Anvil is seemingly in a No. 1 contender's match is beyond me. He was also one of the guys Hogan man-handled on the Main Event show when the Mega Powers exploded, by the way. Macho drops to all fours like a dog, and backs out of the ring. They tie up an roll around the top rope, and Sherri grabs Anvil's ankle. Savage hits a flying knee, but can't get a sunset flip. Anvil gets two off of that.
Anvil rams his head to the buckle, and grabs a bearhug. Savage hits a flying knee to his back to send him to the buckles. Sherri then chokes the Anvil. Savage kicks Neidhart, and hiys an axehandle. Anvil kicks out of that with authority, however. Savage tries a dlam, but Anvil falls on top for two. Anvil hits a shoulderblock to Savage’s midsection from the apron, then vaults over the top anvil hits shoulderblocks in the ring. And a clothesline gets 2.5. Anvil dropkicks Savage to the floor, and follows him out. He hits another dropkick, and hits a powerslam for two. Savage gets tied in the ropes, and Sherri frees him. Anvil charges and splats on the floor, and Savage hits an axehandle. Back in, Savage drops the elbow for the win. **½.
Jesse talks to Slick and the Big Boss Man. They promise a big surprise, hard times, etc.
WWF championship, steel cage match, Big Boss Man vs. Hulk Hogan ©- Slick’s surprise of course is Zeus, costar of the upcoming film No Holds Barred. Hulk comes out but his costar is standing on the steps blocking his entrance. Zeus kicks Hogan’s chest, and hammers his trapezius.
I believe on the Something to Wrestle With podcast, Bruce Prichard said that what actually aired was a reshoot from a taping the next night, because Zeus didn't get it right the first time (I wasn't able to double check that, so I apologize if I'm incorrect). After a break Hogan is laying on the floor, and Boss Man kicks open the door, hitting Earl Hebner in the process. He tosses Hogan in and chokes him with his shirt. He whips Hogan to a corner and he crumples. BBM headbutts Hogan, but Hulk reverses an Irish whip and clotheslines him. He punches away but Boss Man blocks a head-ramming into the cage. Hogan hits a big boot on a charging BBM, and starts to climb. Boss Man hits his back and Hogan drops down. BBM slams him with authortiy, and hits a splash. He points toward the door, though Slick was telling him to punish Hogan more. Hulk stopped him, anyway. Hulk takes a Boss Man Slam coming off the ropes, and BBM goes up. He gets both of his legs over, but Hogan stops him with a choke through the bars. And then the spot- Hulk, on the top rope, superplexes Boss Man down to the mat! The fans are chanting Hogan, but it might as well be "Ho-ly Shit!" Hebner comes and drops both of their arms twice. He then starts a 10 count, an Hogan sits up at eight. Hulk almost crawls out of the door, but Boss Man stops him. BBM gets a clothesline on a ducking Hogan, and Slick tosses a chain to his charge. Boss Man chokes Hogan with it. They both ram each other's head into the cage, but BBM is closer to the door and almost leaves. Hogan rams his head to the buckles, and Hulk picks up the chain. He punches BBM out with it, which Jesse rightly is disgusted by Hulk's cheating. He then ping-pongs BBM's head off of the cage walls, drops the leg, but Slick rams Hebner into the post. He grabs Hulk's ankle and ended up getting beat up. Hulk crotches BBM on the top rope and handcuffs him to it, then Hulk climbs up. Slick brings the key to get Boss Man loose, but Hulk wins in the meantime. Hulk celebrates his win by whipping Slick into the cage, tucks the night stick in his trunks and puts on Slick's hat. ***
Jesse talks to Heenan and the Busters. They're confident, apparently.
WWF tag team championship, Brain Busters vs. Demolition (c)- Blanchard starts with Smash. Smash shoves him back, and then gets a clothesline. Tully runs around outside, and back in Smash gets a bearhug and Smash clotheslines both Busters. Tag to Ax, who works over Arn. He hits a back elbow and a slam. Arn gets clotheslined in the back of the head, and then they be clubberin,' Tony. Tully kicks Smash from outside, and Arn gets a suplex. Smash pops back up and slams Arn. Tully in, and he gets atomic dropped into an Ax slam. The Busters huddle with Heenan outside. Ax pounds away on Tully, but a charge eats boot. Tully jumps off but gets caught . Smash knocks Tully outside, then throws him back in. Ax clotheslines him over the top onto Heenan. Ax flips Tully back in, and clotheslines him. He twists his head, and tags Smash. Smash lifts him up in a choke, but Arn kicks out his knee. He gets the tag, and snapmares Smash. Tully jumps in onto Smash, and gets a hotshot. Arn hits the spinebuster for two. Tully and Arn doubleteam the Demos, and Tully actively blocks Smash from getting a tag. Arn chinlocks Smash, and Tully punches Ax before a tag can be made. Smash gets thrown outside and worked over. Smash and Arn brawl, and knock each other out. Tully pulls Ax off of the apron before he can get a tag. It turns into a Pier-sixer, and Ax tosses the referee. Smash throws Tully out, as does Ax to Blanchard. **, Demos were DQed. The teams brawl to the back.
Jesse talks to Macho and Sherri. The three share an "ohhhh yeah!"
Boris Zhukhov vs. Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka- Boris attacks and rams Snuka's head to the buckle, which of course gets no sold. Boris, however, does not have that superpower. Snuka hits a double-axehandle off of the ropes, and slams Boris. Superfly heads up to the top, and hits the Superfly Splash. *
Gene talks to Hulk. Hulk gives a personal invitation to go see No Holds Barred in theaters. I...don't think that worked.
No comments:
Post a Comment