Hulk and Andre say nothing, and Jesse Ventura talks to Roddy Piper about interrupting Uncle Elmer's wedding on the last episode.
Gene talks to newcomers Terry Funk and Jimmy Hart. Funk will face the Junkyard Dog, and spits tobacco on the camera.
Vince McMahon welcomes us, as we see fans in costumes. We also see Terry Funk beating up a ring attendant from weeks back. Jimm Hart tells Okerlund that was television tricks, that he didn't really do that. "We got some branding to do!"- Terry Funk in 1985, or Stephanie McMahon in 2017?!
We then see a clip of Funk working the Junk Yard Dog over with his branding iron at Madison Square Garden. JYD tells Okerlund tonight is his day (every dog has, get it?).
Drunk Terry Flunk vs. JYD- The dog cheapshots Funk to begin, then bounces him crotch-first on the top rope. So many of the clips from the Coliseum Video ad come from these early SNMEs. Funk bails, then gets a slam back in. He misses an elbow, and gets slammed. Now JYD tosses him over the top. JYD slams him and headbutts Funk, who rolls out to the apron. Jimmy tried to trip the Dog, so he chases him around outside, then backdrops a charging Funk. Funk punches away back in, then grabs a sleeper. JYD then gets a sleeper of his own, but drops Funk to pull Hart in. Funk waffles him with the megaphone and gets the pin. * The Dog blocks the branding iron and hits Funk with it, then punches Hart in the face. JYD pulls Hart's pants off, and brands his butt.
Capt. Lou (as Julius Caesar) and King Kong Bundy (as Zorro) are about to have a pie eating contest.
We see the first SNME appearance of "Macho Man" Randy Savage and Elizabeth here. Albano is YOUR winner.
Piper's Pit with the hillbilly family. He calls Jim "Mrs. Elmer." He asks Elmer what went on on the wedding night, which Elmer answers is "none of your business." Jim says if Jesse Ventura is such a man, why doesn't he come up here and say his comments from the wedding to their faces. Jesse gets in the ring and says he isn't backing down on nothin'. Bob Orton bends over behind Cousin and they schoolboy him, but Jim and Elmer clear the ring. I think you can see what is being set up here.
It's time for the Great Pumpkin Dunk. JYD (dressed as a Mummy), Cousin Junior and Tito Santana (also Zorro?) vs. Heenan, Savage and Elizabeth. Heenan cheats because of course he does. Heenan gets seven to Junior's four.
Okerlund with Heenan, Bundy and Big John Studd. They predict victory over Hogan and Andre. Gene calls the faces the Dream Team, while Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake are already tag team champions with that name.
Studd and Bundy vs. Hogan and Andre- Albano is with the faces, possibly to counteract Heenan. Hogan shoves Bundy to start, and drops him with a kneelift. Hogan almost gets Bundy up for a slam, and hits his usual. Andre in, with chokes and butt-related offense. Hogan hits an axehandle from the top, but gets doubleteamed. Studd shoulders Hogan down, but Hogan back suplexes him. Andre back in with chops. Andre accidentally struck the ref, according to Ventura, as a donnybrook breaks out. Another ref comes out and restores order...as Saturday Night's Main Event rolls on. Andre pounds on Studd when we return, and Hogan tags and clothesline him. Vince calls Andre the Big Boss Man as he steps back in. Big boot by the Giant, and Bundy gets Andre caught in the ropes. Bundy splashes Hogan, and the heels doubleteam Andre while he's tied up. Now the ref calls for the bell. *1/2. I know the workers here are horrendous, but I thought a match this big would get more time. Hogan and Andre get their hands raised by Joey Marella. Okerlund talks to them, and Andre "didn't get enough!"
Okerlund tells us we are moments away from a Tito Santana-Randy Savage intercontiental title bout. Cool! So this is even before the title change. Elizabeth is asked why she is managing Randy, and says she's always had an interest in sports. McMahon calls out Okerlund for looking letcherously at Elizabeth. Pot, kettle.
WWF Intercontiental title, Tito Santana (c) vs. Randy Savage- I figured Savage won the belt on his first try, so this is interesting. After some stalling and punching Savage takes advantage, gets hiptossed but hits an axehandle for two. Jesse questions Chico's cardio after that one. Macho slams him and goes for an axehandle, but Tito hits him in the midsection. Tito fires away as a dude in the front row jumps up and down. Tito slam, and Savage bails. Tito fires on him outside, and Savage slides into the ring to cheapshot him. Savage tries a piledriver and they both get counted out. *3/4 Had I known about this match (and been watching at the time), I would have thought it was only a matter of time before Savage won the belt.
We see the famous (at least with my friends) clip of Mr. Fuji seemingly twisting his ears, in preparation for his match with Ricky Steamboat. Then we see what appears to be the Sheik and Volkoff making out, but it turns out they are playing the pumpkin passing game.
We go to Roddy Piper's "rented American house." Ooooh- is this the Halloween Safety Tips as heard on Wrestlecrap Radio? Actually, Piper is wrapping bricks and bowling balls for the children, so probably not. Vinnie Mac conducts the interview, and infers Piper's home in Scotland doesn't have indoor plumbing. One kid is Hulk Hogan, and IS THAT STEPHANIE MCMAHON?! The bowling ball breaks a kid's bag, and Piper steals the candy. To be fair, that's why you use a plastic pumpkin for TorT'ing. The kids gave Piper chocolate covered red peppers.
Hulk tells Vicious Vince he likes what he just saw.
Fuji breaks a break with a karate chop, and a board on his head.
Kung Fu Challenge match, Mr. Fuji vs. Ricky Steamboat- We see a clip of Magnificent Muraco and Fuji choking Steamboat. Ricky tells Gene tonight he will break out the Dragon. Maybe he should crawl to the ring and be all scarily painted up. Anyway, Fuj throws chops that get blocked, then Steaboat chops him and hits an enziguri (!). Fuj kicks his legs like Jose Aldo, and drops a headbutt to the groin, just like Bruce Lee was famous for. More chops and kicks, then Fuj hiptosses Steamboat. Fuj tries a suplex, which Steamboat reverses. What exactly are the rules here? Steamboat goes to the top and hits a dropkick for the win. * Muraco then blinds Steamboat, who gets double-teamed.
Pumpkin Pass- JYD passes to Santana, who passes to a Hillbilly, who passes to Jim, to Albano, who dropped it. Now the heel team's turn- Bundy to Nikolai to the Sheik to Elizabeth. Piper rubs up against Liz for awhile until it's dropped. Savage yells at her, though he should really be mad at Piper. That clip was also in the Coliseum Video ad, and I didn't know what non-sexual thing could've been happening there with Piper and Liz. I unfortunately couldn't find that ad to act as a visual aid. Sorry.
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