Saturday Night's Main Event #21- Caged chaos!

Hulk gives a promo behind a steel cage wall, and basically runs through the same "judge, jury and executioner" stuff he did a few episodes ago. And we go right into the intro.

From Des Moines, Labor Day weekend 1989.  There will be three title matches. We see the ending of the Ultimate Warrior-"Ravishing" Rick Rude Intercontinental championship match at Wrestlemania V. Bobby "the Brain" Heenan says they didn't break Rule #1-  "Just win baby," Rude says.  

WWF Intercontinental championship, Rick Rude vs. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan- Fuck the Network for changing Rude's music to similar-sounding stripper music. What about his WCW "Simply Ravishing" theme? Duggan, looking especially stupid wearing a crown with his tongue sticking out, says he's proud to be red, white and blue, but he says Rude seems a little pink to him. Ugh. He's going to keep one eye on Heenan, and one on Old Glory. Duggan gets carried out on the throne that Haku and Race previously used, as he beat Haku for the crown. As Duggan plays with his cape Vince says he looks like Batman, while Jesse says he looks like Count Dracula. At least Randy Savage revamped the uniform when he beat DUggan. They lock up and roll around on the top rope. Rude then punches and forearms him, but gets punched on an atomic drop attempt. Duggan then clotheslines him over the top. Duggan suplexes him back in for two. Duggan gets three clotheslines, and Rude falls on his face. Duggan slams him and drops a knee for two. Rude headbutts his midsection and hits a forearm, and catches Duggan coming in in the corner. Rude goes up and hits Duggan in the face. Jesse notes that Rude can't lose the I-C title here; it's printed on his tights. Duggan gets an atomic drop, which always seems to hurt Rude the most. Hmmm. Duggan piledrives Rude, which I've never seen him do. Rude got his foot on the rope, and Haku comes out trying to take the crown. If you've been playing at home, you know this leads to a commercial break. When we return, Duggan is marching on the apron like a moron wearing the crown, and Rude, recovered, attacks him. Rude hits a dropkick, necksnap and drops elbows. Rude shoulders Duggan in the corner, and drops an elbow for two. Rude gets a chinlock with his forearms over Duggans face. Duggan gets free, but Rude hits him with a knee coming off of the ropes. Rude goes up for a fistdrop. He mugs for the camera, then rams the moron's head to the buckle to predictable results. Duggan no sells a bunch of forearms, and pounds away. Duggan gets a big baaaack bodydrop. He hits the three-point stance clothesline, knocking Rude to the floor. The big dummy counts along with the ref, apparently not realizing he won't get the title. ** I'm sorry, I found Duggan especially irritating here. And what is with them booking patriotic wrestlers to beat champions by countout?

Gene talks to Jim Neidhart. He has the unfortunate task of facing the Macho Man. He hates Savage, and he has to go through the Anvil to get a shot at Hulk Hogan's championship. 

Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart vs. Randy "Macho Man" Savage- Jesse talks to Macho Man and Sensational Sherri. He's going after Hogan after getting through the Anvil. Sherri says Liz is no wrestler, and certainly is no lady. How the Anvil is seemingly in a No. 1 contender's match is beyond me. He was also one of the guys Hogan man-handled on the Main Event show when the Mega Powers exploded, by the way. Macho drops to all fours like a dog, and backs out of the ring. They tie up an roll around the top rope, and Sherri grabs Anvil's ankle. Savage hits a flying knee, but can't get a sunset flip. Anvil gets two off of that. 

Anvil rams his head to the buckle, and grabs a bearhug. Savage hits a flying knee to his back to send him to the buckles. Sherri then chokes the Anvil. Savage kicks Neidhart, and hiys an axehandle. Anvil kicks out of that with authority, however. Savage tries a dlam, but Anvil falls on top for two. Anvil hits a shoulderblock to Savage’s midsection from the apron, then vaults over the top anvil hits shoulderblocks in the ring. And a clothesline gets 2.5. Anvil dropkicks Savage to the floor, and follows him out. He hits another dropkick, and hits a powerslam for two. Savage gets tied in the ropes, and Sherri frees him. Anvil charges and splats on the floor, and Savage hits an axehandle. Back in, Savage drops the elbow for the win. **½.

Jesse talks to Slick and the Big Boss Man. They promise a big surprise, hard times, etc.

WWF championship, steel cage match, Big Boss Man vs. Hulk Hogan ©- Slick’s surprise of course is Zeus, costar of the upcoming film No Holds Barred. Hulk comes out but his costar is standing on the steps blocking his entrance. Zeus kicks Hogan’s chest, and hammers his trapezius.

I believe on the Something to Wrestle With podcast, Bruce Prichard said that what actually aired was a reshoot from a taping the next night, because Zeus didn't get it right the first time (I wasn't able to double check that, so I apologize if I'm incorrect). After a break Hogan is laying on the floor, and Boss Man kicks open the door, hitting Earl Hebner in the process. He tosses Hogan in and chokes him with his shirt. He whips Hogan to a corner and he crumples. BBM headbutts Hogan, but Hulk reverses an Irish whip and clotheslines him. He punches away but Boss Man blocks a head-ramming into the cage. Hogan hits a big boot on a charging BBM, and starts to climb. Boss Man hits his back and Hogan drops down. BBM slams him with authortiy, and hits a splash. He points toward the door, though Slick was telling him to punish Hogan more. Hulk stopped him, anyway. Hulk takes a Boss Man Slam coming off the ropes, and BBM goes up. He gets both of his legs over, but Hogan stops him with a choke through the bars. And then the spot- Hulk, on the top rope, superplexes Boss Man down to the mat! The fans are chanting Hogan, but it might as well be "Ho-ly Shit!" Hebner comes and drops both of their arms twice. He then starts a 10 count, an Hogan sits up at eight. Hulk almost crawls out of the door, but Boss Man stops him. BBM gets a clothesline on a ducking Hogan, and Slick tosses a chain to his charge. Boss Man chokes Hogan with it. They both ram each other's head into the cage, but BBM is closer to the door and almost leaves. Hogan rams his head to the buckles, and Hulk picks up the chain. He punches BBM out with it, which Jesse rightly is disgusted by Hulk's cheating. He then ping-pongs BBM's head off of the cage walls, drops the leg, but Slick rams Hebner into the post. He grabs Hulk's ankle and ended up getting beat up. Hulk crotches BBM on the top rope and handcuffs him to it, then Hulk climbs up. Slick brings the key to get Boss Man loose, but Hulk wins in the meantime. Hulk celebrates his win by whipping Slick into the cage, tucks the night stick in his trunks and puts on Slick's hat. ***

Jesse talks to Heenan and the Busters. They're confident, apparently.

WWF tag team championship, Brain Busters vs. Demolition (c)- Blanchard starts with Smash. Smash shoves him back, and then gets a clothesline. Tully runs around outside, and back in Smash gets a bearhug and Smash clotheslines both Busters. Tag to Ax, who works over Arn. He hits a back elbow and a slam. Arn gets clotheslined in the back of the head, and then they be clubberin,' Tony. Tully kicks Smash from outside, and Arn gets a suplex. Smash pops back up and slams Arn. Tully in, and he gets atomic dropped into an Ax slam. The Busters huddle with Heenan outside. Ax pounds away on Tully, but a charge eats boot. Tully jumps off but gets caught . Smash knocks Tully outside, then throws him back in. Ax clotheslines him over the top onto Heenan. Ax flips Tully back in, and clotheslines him. He twists his head, and tags Smash. Smash lifts him up in a choke, but Arn kicks out his knee. He gets the tag, and snapmares Smash. Tully jumps in onto Smash, and gets a hotshot. Arn hits the spinebuster for two. Tully and Arn doubleteam the Demos, and Tully actively blocks Smash from getting a tag. Arn chinlocks Smash, and Tully punches Ax before a tag can be made. Smash gets thrown outside and worked over. Smash and Arn brawl, and knock each other out. Tully pulls Ax off of the apron before he can get a tag. It turns into a Pier-sixer, and Ax tosses the referee. Smash throws Tully out, as does Ax to Blanchard. **, Demos were DQed. The teams brawl to the back. 

Jesse talks to Macho and Sherri. The three share an "ohhhh yeah!"

Boris Zhukhov vs. Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka- Boris attacks and rams Snuka's head to the buckle, which of course gets no sold. Boris, however, does not have that superpower. Snuka hits a double-axehandle off of the ropes, and slams Boris. Superfly heads up to the top, and hits the Superfly Splash. *

Gene talks to Hulk. Hulk gives a personal invitation to go see No Holds Barred in theaters. I...don't think that worked.

Saturday Night's Main Event #20- See My Belt

Liz must choose between Savage and Hogan tonight! And that's all that gets hyped in the intro.

From Hershey, Penn.

"Mean" Gene Okerlund talks to Ravishing Rick Rude and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. Rude faces
Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake tonight. "You know about lousy-looking haircuts," Heenan says to Gene. Rude says a rude awakening will occur if Beefcake tries to use the sleeper on him.

Rick Rude vs. Brutus Beefcake- Brutus tells Gene Rude has no body, and by that he means Rude's hair. Brutus shakes his booty at Rude, much to his chagrin. Tie-up ,as Jesse notes the Ultimate Warrior's visage on the back of Rude's tights. Brutus gets a baaaack bodydrop, and punches in the corner. Brutus gets a sleeper, and rams Rude into the corner.Brutus rams Rude's head in another corner, like it's a strap match. Rude finally gets an atomic drop to take control. Rude hits a forearm, and knees Brutus's midsection coming off the ropes. He then gives Brutus his own turnbuckle medicine, according to Jesse. Snap suplex gets two. Rude gets a sleeper on the mat. Brutus elbows out but Rude locks it back on. Now Andre the Giant lumbers out, as Brutus kind-of Stone Cold Stuns Rude to escape. Brutus gestures at Andre, ducks a clothesline and gets an atomic drop on Rude. Rude tosses him out, and Andre butt-drops Brutus and chokes him on the floor. Jake the Snake Roberts then comes out with Damian in the bag, and Rude and Roberts brawl into the ring for a DQ. **1/4 Andre holds Roberts for some blows, until Beefcake evens things up. Andre chokes Jake in the ropes, but Brutus clotheslines Rude over the top. Beefer's blows get no-sold by Andre, who chokes Brutus until Big John Studd (!) makes a rare appearance. The giants stare each other down, until Andre flips over the top to escape Damian. Studd was back as a face and feuding with Andre. He refereed the Roberts-Andre match at Mania V, but soon disappeared because of his declining health. His face run was so short that appearances such as these are quite the rarity.

Jesse discusses Bad News Brown's assertion that Liz has given WWF president Jack Tunney "favors" to help Savage's career.

Hulk Hogan vs. Bad News Brown- I prefer to receive my Bad News from Wade Barrett, but YMMV. Gene talks to Hulk and Liz. Hogan tells Gene to "shut up," and not repeat those filthy lies. Savage putting Liz in the middle to destroy the Mega Powers is what hurt her the most, Hulk says. Hulk, chivalrous as always, is going to do what Savage couldn't do, and stick up for her vs. Brown. Seriously, what a dick. Has Hulk not seen that awesome Savage-Brown street fight from one of the "Best of the WWF" tapes? There is also a weird sound issue with this episode on the Network; i've had to turn it way down because of distortion. Bad News attacks to begin. Bad boot chokes Hogan on the mat. A thrust to the throat drops Chump Hogan, but Lust Hogan avoids two elbowdrops and Hulks Up. He hits a right hand off of the ropes, and Bad goes out, and Hogan attacks him. He pulls on the top rope to fling him back in, and shoulderblocks him down. An axe bomber drops BNB, and Hogan drops elbows.  Hulk hits a big boot to drop Bad, but he pulls the heel up by his goatee.  Hulk rams his head to the buckle, Bad no sells and headbutts Hogan.  BNB whips him to the corner but eatst a boot. Atomic drop sends Bad outside. Hogan follows him, an rams Bad's head into the railing. They brawl outside,and bad whips him to the post. Bad misses a punch and hits the post, then grabs a chair. Hogan blocks the chair and hits bad with it. Brown rams it to his own head, as Jesse notes it had no effect on him. BNB tells Hogan to wait right there, and walks to the back. Joey Marella starts counting him out but Hogan stops him. Bad then comes back with a big shovel.  Hogan blocks the object, and sends Bad back in. He whips Bad to the corner and gets clotheslined. He rams Hogan's head to the mat, and continues the beating. BNB slams Hogan, and drops a leg. He then kicks Hogan in the gut, and he falls outside. Bad menaces Liz, and Hogan catches him but gets posted. Back in, Bad gets a Russian legsweep for two. Bad gets the house mic, and says "Look at your hero!" He calls for the ghetto blaster, but misses. Hulk engages the Hulk Up sequence. He hits a high knee and drops the leg. **1/2. Liz then claps along as Hogan poses, and even cups her ear.

We see Randy Savage pacing outside of Liz's dressing room.

Ted Dibiase shows off the Million Dollar Belt to Okerlund. Gene says Jack Tunney and the WWF has not sanctioned the belt. He will face "shining star" Blue Blazer, who Ted says will fall and he'll be there for the three count.

Count E. Jacula I mean, Ted Dibiase vs. Blue Blazer- Gene talks to the Blazer. That heavy belt will keep The Million Dollar Man on the ground, while the Blazer says he'll fly. I'm debating if I knew the Blazer's identity at this point. And I don't have the Hart to spoil it right now for newer readers, like Kevin Steen's son Owen. Ahem. Dibiase attacks the Blazer after a backlift from the top rope. He rams Blazer's head to the buckle, and gives him a back elbow. Bodyslam is followed by elbow and fist drops. Blazer gets a small package coming off the ropes, and a backslide gets two. Dibiase rakes the eyes to regain the advantage. Dibiase hits a clothesline, and hits an axehandle off of the middle rope. Dibiase gets a suplex, but taunts instead of covering. He backdrops Blazer, who lands on his feet and dropkicks Dibiase to the floor. Blazer hits a bodypress through the ropes onto Dibiase. Blazer punches away, and atomic drops Dibiase into the ring post. Blazer tosses Dibiase back in, and hits a body press for two. Baaack body drop is followed by two dropkicks. Blazer gets two off of uppercuts. Dibiase catches Blazer in the air and powerslams him for the win. ** This could have been even better with more time. We see Savage still outside Elizabeth's door as Dibiase celebrates.

Gene calls Liz out to the interview podium.  Gene asks her are you going to be in Hulk's corner, or Macho Man's corner? It's the hardest decision she's ever had to make in her life. She cares for both men. She says "no" about being in Hogan's corner, and Macho Man comes out esctatic about what he thinks that means. She of course says she's not going to be in Savage's corner, either. Hulk comes out, and threatens to take the title at WMV. God Hogan was such a heel in this story, compared to Macho as a face. He even made sure to call Liz "his manager."

Gene talks to the Brain Busters. Arn Anderson is apparently the power guy in the group. I guessssss. Gene also said the Rude match was strike 1 against Bobby for the night.

The Brain Busters vs. The Rockers- Marty Jannetty tells Gene "when we're good, we're good; when we're bad, we're better." I'll let the reader make their own Marty joke. As I paused this video I noticed a fan in the front row wearing a WWF trucker hat, plaid shirt and suspenders. Vladimir, this guy ain't.  Arn and Tully attack to start. Tully tries a slingshot but Marty gets out of it. Marty tries a sunset flip on Blanchard (no relation), and HBK hits Tully with a bodypress. The Rockers do-si-do when they're whipped together, and dropkick the Busters out of the ring. Arn forearms Shawn and heads up top, but Michaels kips up and slams Double A off. Michaels gets a Boston Crab, Tully jumps off of the top but Michaels hits him in the belly-welly (TM Dusty Rhodes, R.I.P.). Jannetty cuts him off, and the Rockers duck blows and superkick the Busters out of hte ring. Shawn suplexes Tully back in, and hiptosses him out of the corner. He hits a flying headscissors, and Power Man Arn000 is in. Arn gets a shoulderblock, but HBK gets a drop toehold. Arn kicks Shawn in the gut coming off the ropes, and he tags Tully. Heenan pulls the top rope down as Shawn hits it, and Michaels hits the floor. Jannetty comes over, but while the ref argues with him Heenan takes some cheaps shots. Heenan then gets thrown out by the ref. After a break, we see Marty pulling Tully in by the head. They slug it out, and Tully tags Arn while up for an atomic drop. Marty clotheslines Tully, but Arn takes off his head. Go ahead and celebrate, other Marty; you deserve it. Arn whips Jannetty into Tully's knee. Tully rakes his eyes across the top rope. Marty gets a sunset flip, but Arn gets tagged and cuts off Marty tagging HBK. With Marty outside Tully axehandles his back. Jannetty gets a sunset flip on Arn, broken up by Tully. Blanchard and Jannettty get a series of reversals, but Jannetty still can't tag Shawn. Arn rakes his laces on Marty's face, and gives him a HUGE spinebuster. HBK breaks that up. Arn gives him a bodyslam, but a Vader bomb hits knees. Shawn finally gets tagged in, and fires away on both busters. He dropkicks Arn, then knocks noggins. Tully sunset flips Shawn for two, and the brawl spills outside. Shawn alley-oops Tully onto Arn, and both teams get counted out. I think we have our first **** SNME match, folks! Rockers doubledropkick Arn, and dropkick Tully out, too. Each Buster gets dropkicked off of the apron as well. I love that in 1989 the WWF had the AWA (Rockers), Crockett (Busters) and WWF (Demolition) tag team champs from, let's say February 1988.

We flash back to the last SNME, where The Red Rooster turned on Heenan. Then we see the Primetime incident when the Brooklyn Brawler ebuts, and HOLY SHIT HE HIT GORILLA WITH A STOOL! I didn't remember that. Heenan said the Brawler is a "bigger, better nobody" than Rooster is.

Brooklyn Brawler vs. The Red Rooster- It may be hard to wrap your brain around Bobby Heenan managing the Brooklyn Brawler if you didn't watch back then, but this is how Steve Lombardi got that gimmick. It's always worth trying stuff like that; you just never know what will catch on. Brawler slaps Rooster around to begin. He rakes at Terry's eyes, as Bobby is mic'ed again. Taylor hits a dropkick and a hiptoss. Taylor rolls up the Brawler coming off of the ropes for the win. * Taylor gestures at Heenan while acting like a chicken. The Brawler of course clotheslines him from behind. McMahon calls it strike three of the night, though really Rockers-Busters was a draw. Jesse counters that Bobby got three hits tonight, so he's batting. 1000. I’m not sure these guys understand batting averages. Brawler attacked Rooster with Heenan, but the chicken ran them off.

Savage tells Gene he doesn't need anyone; he's the champion.

The Main Event 2

That doesn't surprise me at all, Waukesha. Not. At. All.

The intro has faux USA Today-like newspapers as they recap all of the events leading up to the Mega Powers vs. Mega Bucks tonight. 

LIVE from Milwaukee's Bradley Center. This is significant to me for two reasons: 1. I was a huge fan at the time, and lived in Milwaukee's market. I had attended Wrestlefest at Milwaukee County Stadium (then-home of the Brewers) the previous summer, so I'm not sure why I didn't go/harass my parents to take me to this show. My best guess is because it was on the weekend of my dad's birthday. 2. This was one of the first events at the Bradley Center, which opened the previous fall and replaced the MECCA as the main arena in Milwaukee. The building would turn 30 this year, but it's being replaced by a new arena and eventually being torn down. I've probably attended wrestling, hockey, basketball and soccer games, along with concerts, a total of 75 times in the BC's existence. I'll turn 40 this year; I shouldn't be attending events at a third Milwaukee main arena already in my life. So, again, I wish I could say I was at this event, but I was not.

Gene talks to Slick and the Towers. Slick shares his three laws of wrestling dynamics. "We are three mens, they are two mens. It's the laaaaw." The other two are the law of the jungle and the land. I can't really do this whole thing justice; it's the rare case of (I assume) contributing writers making wrestling promos better. 

A special video on the Mega Powers' friendship airs. The WWE Network has some truly God-awful music dubbed in, but if you watch the original (like I just did), you get "You're a Friend of Mine" by Clarence Clemons and Jackson Browne.  Jesse Ventura is not convinced things are honky-dory after watching the video.

Gene talks to the Mega Powers. Gene says the love between a brother and a sister, the love between two brothers, and then the love between a man and a woman, will lead the Mega Powers on to victory. Savage can steel feel Hogan's pain from the beating he has taken from the Towers. Gene comments to Liz that she's got her team ready.

The Twin Towers vs. The Mega Powers- Notice that Savage is wearing his yellow "Mega Powers" trunks, while Hogan is wearing trunks with no message on his bottom. The Powers disagree on who should start while the Boss Man is all set to go. Savage comes in, but Boss Man gestures that he wants Hogan instead. It works, as the WWF champion once again takes a back seat to the Hulkster. Boss Man rakes his eyes, but Hogan fires away, punches Slick and Akeem, and atomic drops Boss Man over the top. The heels regroup. Back in, BBM knees Hogan and hammers away. Hogan rams his head to the buckle, and to the near side as well. BBM slips outside instead of taking a punch, but Macho rams his head into the steps. Hogan dances as Akeem gets the tag. The Mega Powers pinball him in the corner, and Hulk clotheslines him. It doesn't drop Akeem, but Hulk then full nelsons him for a Macho axehandle. Savage and Hogan doubleteam Akeem, and Hulk does his own axehandle. Akeem retaliates, and tags BBM. Boss Man clotheslines Hogan, and piledrives him. He tags Akeem instead of going for a cover. QUick tags by the heels as they work Hogan over. Boss Man tries another pildriver, but gets backdropped to the floor. Outside, Hogan posts him, but Slick grabs Hulk's ankle as he goes back in. Savage kicks Slick to get him off, and Hogan gets Boss Man slammed. He gets a near fall from that, and tags Akeem. More doubleteaming Hulk, but BBM accidentally hits Akeem and Hulk gets the tag. He slingshots Akeem's throat on the top, and hits a flying bodypress for two. Slick nails Savage with the billy club as he hits the ropes. BBM pounds on his back, and they double back-elbow Savage. Akeem throws Savage over the top. I thought...it was that time. Savage then tosses him again, this time on to Elizabeth. This was a shocking turn of events, especially since we had never seen Liz bump like that before.  Hulk covers both Savage and Liz, in my mind trying to secretly get a pinfall on Savage. The first one must have been intoxicating, judging by how many Hulk would get over the next decade. So Hogan pushes Savage out of the way and hovers over Liz, and as Savage gets up and is like "what the hell?" Akeem pulls him back in. Hulk picks up Liz and carries her to the back, as we see the Towers missing double elbowdrops on Savage. Macho then can't believe his eyes as he sees his partner carrying his woman to the back, leaving him to battle the behemoths alone. Liz gets placed on a stretcher and is taken to the back, and if you squint you can see the Hart Foundation watching on. Liz gets taken to a medical room in the back, as Hulk begs the medical staff to "please save her," like she's perished or something. "Randy didn't mean it; I swear he didn't." Mean what? He got thrown onto her by Akeem! Savage is still getting beaten on in the ring. Hulk then runs back to the ring. Akeem chokes Savage on the ropes and snaps him off. BBM tags in as Hulky runs back to his corner. What a farce this is a match. The Towers doubleteam Savage, and give him a double backbreaker. They both hit the ropes at the same time, and Akeem comically falls out and BBM falls on his face. Savage axehandles him and throws both out, and when Hogan reaches for the tag he slaps Hulk's face. Boss Man works Hogan over and Savage leaves. BBM and Akeem miss a double avalanche in the corner, and Savage comes back for his belt and Hogan argues with him. Then BBM avalanches Hulk in the corner. You'd think that'd be the end, but Akeem avalanches Hulk and splashes him, which starts up the Hulk Up sequence. You know the rest. *1/2. So the Twin Towers are so ineffective, they couldn't beat Savage nor Hogan when they were by themselves for minutes on end. No wonder they were demoted to the second match at WMV against the Rockers after this. Boss Man tries to cuff Hogan after, but somehow gets handcuffed to Slick. Jesus, Terry. As a match this ranks somewhere between Savage-Steamboat and the Uncensored '96 cage match (and I think you know which one I think it's closer to), but it was all to serve the break-up angle, anyway.

Hulk heads to the back yelling for the Macho Man. Savage is in the medical room ranting and raving to Liz. Savage tells Hulk he has jealous eyes. He's been in a backseat in the Mega Powers, but he's not No. 3, he's No. 1. He says Hulk never asked him for a title shot because he knows he can't beat him (pronouns, pal). When Hulk turns to Liz and asks her to try to talk some sense into Macho, 

Savage decks Hulk with the belt. Liz then jumps up and covers Hogan. Savage then shoves her down, and before he can it Hogan with the belt, Brutus Beefcake grabs the belt and gets shoved down. Then WWF officials come, and Savage throws Pat Patterson down. Nick Bockwinkel unfortunately doesn't take a bump here like he did for the Ultimate Warrior at the Royal Rumble the month prior.

Hercules vs. Ted Dibiase- We go back to the first aid area and Gene. He will try to somehow get to Hogan. Herc jumps Dibiase while he's still on the apron. He flips Dibiase into the ring, and gives him a War and Peace atomic drop. He sends Dibiase outside, and pulls Virgil in to the ring to rough up. He then whips Virgil into Dibiase, knocking him off of the apron. He slingshots Dibiase in, and press slams him across the ring. Herc again atomic drops Dibiase, and he flies over the top. Noggins get knocked on the floor, and Dibiase finally necksnaps Herc over the top to the floor. Dibiase punches away on the floor and throws Herc back in. Dibiase clotheslines Herc the Jerk, and drops fists for two. Dibiase knees him in the midsection, and hits an axehandle for two. Herc keeps kicking out "with authority." Dibiase tries a suplex but Herc reverses it. Dibiase rams his head to the buckles, Herc reverses a whip but eats boot. Dibiase picks Herc up for a slam, as Vince explains the dead crowd still being shocked by the Mega Powers exploding. Herc kicks out again. Herc rams Dibiase's head to the buckle repeatedly, and hits a powerslam on Dibiase as he bounds off of the ropes. Dibiase rams a charging Hercules' head to the buckle, and Virgil works on untieing the buckle. Dibiase, though is the one whose head gets rammed, but Herc only gets two. Herc gets the backbreaker, but the ref goes to pull the chain off. Virgil pulls Herc by the tights to get him to break, and Dibiase gets a rollup for the pin. * Herc then slams Dibiase, and goes to get the chain. Much like with Roman Reigns today, they were kind of pushing Herc, but having him lose this feud cooled off any chance of him becoming a top guy. I never believed Scott Keith's story that Herc was being positioned as the third Mega Power, but if that was true he wouldn't be needed in that capacity anymore, anyway. 

So Gene is back in the medical room and Hulk is ranting incoherently. We go back to Vince and Jesse, and then see Hogan opening doors and throwing equipment cases in the hallway. He finds Jim Neidhart and throws him, and pushes Shawn Michaels into a wall, and questions Bret Hart and Marty Jannetty. I'm sure all of those guys were thrilled to have the honor of appearing on The Main Event that way. 

And that concludes the second edition of the Main Event. I'd call the match quality a wash, but I dare say Main Event 1 had the more important angle. I think Wrestlemania V did better than IV on pay-per-view, so what do I know? 

Saturday Night's Main Event #19- Bass's hair today, gone tomorrow

"Victory!" No, it's not Johnny Drama- it's the Ultimate Warrior! The Honky Tonk Man is going to get his belt back. Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake isn't over "Outlaw" Ron Bass taking away his Intercontinental title shot. Slick and Akeem are here tonight to rid wrestling of the evil influence of Hulk Hogan. You're doing the Lord's work there, guys. Hulk doesn't know where Akeem comes from? It's Africa! The outline of the continent is right on his gear!

From the Tampa Sun Dome. It's probably more Global Dome than Sky Dome in terms of size.

"Mean" Gene Okerlund talks to Bass. Jack Bass (TM Bryan Alvarez) calls his spurs The Maverick Brothers, Bret and Bart, and his whip Miss Betsy. The Bros. are going to tenderize Beefcake's head.

Hair match, Ron Bass vs. Brutus Beefcake- we see a history package, with Brutus first cutting up Miss Betsy, and then Bret and Bart cutting Beefcake’s forehead to keep him out of Summerslam. Beefcake tells Gene he doesn't wanna forget any of it. It's apparently a matter of hair, which Gene couldn't understand. Bass attacks to start, choking Beefer with Betsy. Beefcake pushes him into the corner to break free, then retrieves the whip. Bass bails why Brutus snaps the whip. Bass knees him to the gut, but the Booty Man hits a heinie, I mean high knee. Brutus knocks him off the apron teice, not letting him back in. Brutus punches him down three times, and rops a fist. He punches the Outlaw about the head several times, and does his strut. Brutus rams him into the top turnbuckle, but takes a big atomic drop. Bass gives him a gutbuster, and puts him on the top like it's a damn Royal Rumble. He kicks Brutus in the gut and he falls to the floor. Back in, Bass elbows him in the gut, and kicks a charging Beefcake in the tummy. He rams Brutus to the mat once more. Why is he focusing on his midsection? Soften up his forehead or something. Bass gvets a piledriver, which is a good step, but won't pin him. Bass pantomimes haircutting, and then drops Brutus throat-first on the top. Bass then pulls him up again, and gestures at the hedgeclippers. A big clothesline drops Brutus, and that time he covers but doesn't hook the leg. Bass thinks he won, and grabs the clippers. He misses a clothesline and gets caught in the sleeper, and his arm falls three time. *1/4. This is apparently what happens when Bass gets most of the offense. After a break Brutus is cutting Bass' hair. He gets shaved down to stubble. The Outlaw was in the Royal Rumble later that month, and then I believe he disappeared from the WWF.

Gene talks to Slock, Bossman and Akeem. Gene said Boss Man gave Hogan the worst beating he's ever seen Hulk take. Gene then thinks to ask why Boss Man is even there, seeing as how Akeem is wrestling him. He's there because Hogan's a repeat offender, apparently. Does it count if they're all from the same sex tape?

Hulkkkster says he and the Hulkamaniacs have faced trouble before, but tonight he has Miss Elizabeth in his corner. Gene suggests he's outmanned, and who should wander in? The WWF champion, that's who! "The scales of justice have tipped a little more in my way!" Hulk says. Savage is going to watch with Gene.

Akeem vs. Hulk Hogan- Savage and Gene are in a dungeon, apparently. Savage pulls down his glasses when Hogan opens the ropes for Liz. Fuck- we get tesased by the Slam of the Night again. I couldn't find the original video from the last SNME, probably won't this one, either. Hulk evades an Akeem charge, slams Slick into him, and the ref somehow counts a pin with Slick sandwiched. Hulk stuffs his headband in Akeem's mouth, goes outside and throws Slick into Boss Man. He punches away at Akeem, who dances groggily. Hulk mocks that, and fails to slam Akeem. Akeem drops an elbow, and punches away. He whips Hogan to the corner, but Hulk gets out of the way of a charge. He rams Akeem around to the buckles, but can't drop him with a clothesline. He knocks Boss Man off the apron, and drops Akeem with a clothesline. He works the arm, and Akeem pulls him down by the hair. Hulk hammers away, and finally drops Akeem with an axebomber. He whips Akeem into Boss Man, chops away at the former OMG, and again drops him. Hogan dances at Akeem, who lays on the top buckle. Boss Man gets back up, Hogan whips Akeem to the corner, but he pulls the ref in front of Hogan to get squashed. Boss Man comes in and works over Hogan with the nightstick. Macho thinks Hulk will be OK, as we see him finally getting his ass kicked, with Liz going to find Macho unlike the other way around. We also see Sam Houston randomly in the hallway, a full year after I figured he had left the WWF. Akeem goes up to the middle rope, and Liz finds Savage. He tells her Hulk will be OK. Hulk starts the Hulk Up sequence, proving Savage correct. He clotheslines Akeem, punches Boss Man and Slick off of the apron, and with the ref up the match is somehow continuing. He follows Boss Man out and rams his head to the apron, and atomic drops Slick into BBM. Back in, he hits the big boot on Akeem, which doesn't drop him. Hulk slams Akeem, hits the ropes, but Boss Man waffles him with the nightstick for the DQ. *1/2. BBM chokes Hogan with the stick, as Liz gets in the ring. The heels menace Liz, and Boss Man slips handcuffs on her. Macho finally shows up swinging a chair. Jesse points out Savage only showed up once Liz was in trouble. Liz goes over the check on Hulk, and Macho grabs her by the arm and questions that.

Gene talks with HTM and Jimmy Hart. Being the challenger doesn't change Honky's strategy. He just goes about being the greatest Intercontinental champion of all time.

WWF Intercontinental championship, Honky Tonk Man vs. The Ultimate Warrior (c)- Honky is doing the time-honored tradition here of doing lots of jobs now that his title run has ended. Jinder Mahal is currently in the midst of his, which hopefully will continue. Okerlund asks Warrior why give Honky a shot now, when he's prepared for Warrior? "Victory was mine once; it will be again," Warrior shouts. Honky bails when Warrior enters. I had to pause the video, as McMahon claimed Honky could make history, by being the first man to regain the Intercontiental championship. At that point in time Pedro Morales, Don Muraco and Tito Santana were all two-time champions. Currently, Chris Jericho sits at nine and The Miz has eight, though the title today isn't nearly as prestigious as it was back in the heyday. Warrior chases Honky down the aisle, and press-slams him back to and into the ring. Warrior leapfrogs Honky, and boots him in the face. Hart jumps on the apron, an Warrior knocks his and Honky's noggins. Warrior hits a back elbow, and picks Honky up by the throat. Warrior punches away in the corner, and whips Honky and battering rams him in the other corner. He whips Honky again, but this time the pool is empty. Honky then whacks Warrior with Hart's megaphone while he has the ref tied up. Honky drops axehandles to the Warrior's back, and Hart chokes him while the ref is distracted. Honky kicks and punches Warrior in the corner, but the champ is starting to get his special. Warrior rams Honky's head to the buckle, and hits a big clothesline. Warrior criss-crosses the ropes, but lands on knees. Honky gets a two-count off of that. Honky hits a clothesline but falls down himself. Honky then misses two clotheslines, and a flying shoulderblock from Warrior gets the duke. *1/2. The match did everything it needed to do; I just wouldn't call it technically good or anything.

Gene talks to the Twin Towers and Slick. Slick wonders how close the Mega Powers are. "How many more of these beatings can Hulk Hogan survive?"

Jesse talks to Bobby Heenan and the Red Rooster. Rooster was undefeated. Jesse and Heenan talk about Rooster's shortcomings.He's got the one thing he needs to get to the top of the WWF- Heenan's brain. And Bobby says he's done his part, Rooster needs to do his.

Red Rooster vs. Tito Santana- Heenan is mic'ed, for some reason. Ha, a young Bill Alfonso is the referee. They lock up, Taylor (Terry, Terrence if you're nasty) slaps him, and Tito responds with a punch. Tito leapfrogs, and gets a dropkick. Heenan talks to George Steinbrenner in the front row. Heenan asks "What do you do with these people?" to which Big Stein of course replies "fire them!" A splashing Tito hits knees, and Rooster stomps him. He does a kind of reverse Stone Cold Stunner, and chokes Santana. Santana punches away, as Heenan tells the ref to step in. Rooster goes for a sunset flip, but Tito punches out. Tito rams his head to the corner and strikes him about the stomach. tito gets a baaaack bodydrop, and goes for the figure four. Rooster pulls his hair to stop that, and Heenan yanks Taylor outside and shoves him. Rooster then shoves him back. After a break Tito suplexes Rooster back in from the apron. Rooster kicks Tito on a backdrop attempt. Taylor drops a knee for two. Rooster gets two off of a backbreaker. Taylor tries a suplex, and Tito gets a small package for two. They fight over a backslide, and Tito gets two. Tito whips him to the corner but eats boot. Taylor gets a piledriver for two. Taylor gets a hot shot but tries to go for a sharpshooter instead of pinning him. Tito clotheslines him over the top, and Heenan throws him back in. We then get 2018's favorite pin, the distraction rollup. *3/4. Heenan slaps Rooster while he's arguing with him, and Taylor punches him. He whips Heenan into the top buckle, and he takes a good bump. Heenan lays on the top buckle and Taylor keeps working him over. He throws Heenan throw the middle rope to the post, and then when Rooster hits him he does an amazing flip bump. This was all well and good, but why did he remain the Red Rooster after this? And why did he go from an incompetent student to some sort of chicken man? The mind wobbles.

Gene is with someone named Curt Hennig. Never heard of him. He makes no mistakes, and has the perfect wrestling hold. Koko B. Ware will see said hold tonight.

"Mr. Perfect" Curt Hennig vs. Koko B. Ware- I saw Hennig's WWF debut at Wrestlefest in summer 1988. His opponent was the man who became the Red Rooster. Hennig chops Ware in the corner, but gets hiptossed and slammed. Koko dropkicks Perfect to the floor. McMahon surprisingly corrects Jesse, that it's perfectly, not "he likes his matches to go perfect." Hennig pounds away in the corner, and hits a kneelift. Koko reverses a whip, and gets an armdrag. Hennig grabs a headlock, Koko leapfrogs twice and gets an armdrag. Perfect knees him in the gut, and forearms his back. He rams Koko's head to the buckle, but Koko responds in kind. Standing dropkick levels the Birdman, and he rolls out by Frankie the macaw. Koko gets a clothesline back in, but misses a charge to the corner. Hennig grabs him and hits the Perfectplex for the win. ** Hennig remains undefeated. I think he's just Mr. Perfect from Wrestlemania V on.

Gene talks to the Megapowers. and Liz. "The Megapowers team are as one," Hogan says. Savage says he could feel every blow Hogan received. Gene doesn't grill Savage on why he didn't help, then. Jesse calls the promo a cover-up.

This was a slightly above-average episode. The top match topped out at two stars, but everything did what it needed to do to advance angles (the breakup of the Mega Powers) or put guys over (Warrior). Obligatory Clash book plug- https://www.amazon.com/dp/B078HRSNZ1 .

Saturday Night's Main Event #18- 10 Seconds a Slave

War! The Ultimate Warrior declares war, here on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. “I’m the champion!” Andre the Giant bellows again. WWF champion Randy ”Macho Man” Savage likens his bout with Andre to David vs. Goliath. Ted Dibiase is sending Virgil after his slave, Hercules. Hulk Hogan does his first promo on this show about going on Brother Love’s interview segment. Yep.

From Sacramento, California.

Gene talks to Mr. Fuji and the Super Ninja 1. This is the only time I ever saw this character, who I believe was Rip Oliver under the mask.

WWF intercontinental championship, Super Ninja 1 vs. The Ultimate Warrior (c)- Gene talks to the champ. “War holds no secrets for.me, war holds only victory.” Ninja attacks to start, but Warrior no-sells and catches a kick. He catches another and flips the Ninja backwards. Warrior leapfrogs him, and kicks Ninja to the floor. Warrior press-slams him back into the ring, and shakes them ropes. He rams Ninja's head to the buckles, and back elbows him off of the ropes. Another clothesline drops him, and Warrior presses Ninja. A splash finishes him. * I thought they were going to give Ninja a little offense for drama.

We see Ted Dibiase buying Hercules from Bobby Heenan as a slave. I forgot the Megapowers feud kind of transitioned to this.

Virgil vs. Hercules- Hercules tells Gene he is a free man. This whole story would've been better if Herc actually won the feud. Dibiase and Virgil doubleteam to begin, but Herc gets a double clothesline. Herc gets a baaaaack bodydrop on Virgil, and clotheslines him to the floor. Herc chases Dibiase around outside and through the ring, and clotheslines Virgil. Herc hits a back elbow, and hits one to the mat. Dibiase jumps on the apron, but Virgil doesn't capitalize. Herc hits him downstairs, and rocks him with a kneelift. He drops Virg with a clothesline, but kicks at Dibiase instead of following up. Virg hits Herc, but gets clotheslined again. Herc hits a powerslam, and gets the pin. * This accomplished what it set out to do. Herc tosses Virgil onto Dibiase, and swings his chain so Dibiase can't enter the ring.

We see footage of Andre getting scared of Damian on the last SNME. I still don't like this whole deal. Gene talks to Andre and Heenan. When Gene suggests Andre has a phobia, Andre is ready to wallop him. Heenan stops that and says everyone knows Andre is the champion, and "we'll get it back tonight."

WWF championship, Andre the Giant vs. Randy Savage- This match should feel like a bigger deal, but I think the Hacksaw Duggan and Jake Roberts feuds knocked Andre down a few pegs. Gene talks to the champ and Liz. Gene says "why risk it all in front of 35 million people..." Sure, Gene. On the Something to Wrestle With podcast about Savage, I believe Bruce Prichard said Andre didn't like working with Randy. And holy shit- Vince throws it to the Mountain Dew Slam of the Night, but they don't show it! Booo! I'll have to see if I can find the original airing of this show. Anyway, Savage went to attack but Andre grabbed him by the throat. Savage tries to fight, but Andre grabs him. He knees Savage in the corner, and squashes him there. Savage eventually kicks him, but he gets caught again. Andre chokes Savage with the Tarzan part of his singlet. Savage shoulders him in the corner, but Andre stops him. Andre headbutts him down, then chokes him against the top rope. He whips Savage down, then chokes so more. He holds Savages arms, but Savage pops him in the chin with his head. Andre takes over again, though. Savage gets loose and axehandles him to the head, then kicks him when he's down on one knee. Jake Roberts wanders out, which can mean only one thing- we're close to a commercial break. He put the snake bag under the ring. It's funny to see Jake, Liz and Macho all on the same side here. Savage goes out and  tells Jake to leave, and the Snake whispers something to him. When we resume Savage hits an axehandle to Andre as Heenan looks under the ring for Damian. Savage kicks away at the Giant, who is preoccupied by the search for Damian. Savage axehandles Andre while his back is turned. Heenan is overturning chairs on the floor. Andre headbutts Savage down, and repeadteldy butt-drops him. Savage rolls out after Heenan. Andre flips him back in, as Heenan finds Damian and tries to leave with him. Jake chases Heenan into the ring, then Savage whips Heenan into Andre. Andre gets tied in the ropes, and Savage tosses out Heenan. Savage invites Jake in, and he lets out Damian. Heenan gets Andre free before the snake gets to him, though. McMahon says this was a double-disqualification. *

Gene is with Duggan. Hacksaw likes to keep things simple. You’ll raise another flag.in the U.S.A. Over his dead body. He also insults Dino Bravo’s flag, because of course he does.

Boris Zhukov vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan- winner gets his flag raised. Not sure why his promo was about Bravo. Duggan chases Zhukov off with the board to begin. They slug it out, and Duggan gives him an atomic drop. Clothesline, and Boris bails. They lock up and roll around the ropes, and Zhukov takes advantage with a punch. He knees Duggan when he goes to backflip the Russian, but he takes over again with punches. Both men miss moves, and Boris bites Duggan's head. Zhuchov whips Duggan, but gets clotheslined. Duggan executes a scoop slam, then hits the 3-point stance clothesline for the win. * He then salutes his flag. Comrade Trump would be proud... or would he?
We see Hulk's first appearance on the Brother Love Show, when the Big Boss Man beat him and handcuffed him to a railing.

Speaking of Bruce Pritchard, it's the Brother Love Show. We then see Gene interview Hulk, as they watch Love introduce Slick instead of Hulk. Love then brings out the Hulkster. Love cuts off the posing. He asks Hulk how it felt.when the Boss Man whipped his back. He pulls the mic away, and says it must have felt real good. Love asks what was going through his mind while he was getting beaten, and he and Slick answer for him. Hulk then grabs the mic, and threatens to show him the school of hard knox, Hulkamania-style. Hulk then asks the heels how they’d like it if a Hulkamaniac did the same thing to them, and answers himself. Judge Hogan would also pass the execution on Love. Hulk grabs Slick, and tosses him to the floor. Love nails Hulk from behind, tells Hulk he doesn't want to lose control again, and Hulk slams him. Hulk then handcuffs him to the top, and clotheslines him over it. Brother Love could have lost an arm!

Jesse talks to the Rougeaus and Jimmy Hart. The big scoop is the Rougeaus have moved to the U.S., in Memphis. I hate three fourths of the people on my screen here.

The Young Stallions vs. The Rougeaus- Powers and Jacques start. Jacques shoulderblocks then dropkicks Powers. Powers grabs a headlock, monkeyflips fails. Jacques axehandles him, Rougeaus doubleteam. They do a press backbreaker thing, and Jacques hits a flying back elbow for two. Jacques misses a twisting bodypress, and Powers tags Roma. Roma clotheslines Raymond and slams Jacques, and hits a fistdrop. Clothesline Raymond, and a missile dropkick gets two. Powers and Jacques brawl, and then with the ref distracted they hit their doubleteam move for the win. *1/2 Could have been decent with time.

Jesse talks to Andre and Heenan. Jesse says "Andre, I can't believe you're afraid of a snake," an Andre grabs him by the lapels. Andre tells Jake to fight like a man. Gene tells Jake that Andre obviously has a phobia. He says he and Damian won't stop until they've totally consumed one giant.

Gene talks to Hogan about his interview earlier. Being the executioner apparently turned him on. It won't be the electric chair or gas chamber, brother. With 20/20 hindsight, this interview sounds really bad.

I'm not sure I'd recommend this episode. Andre-Savage should've been a bigger deal, and the other matches are that great. What would be great, however, is for you to click one of the links on the right for one of my ebooks. In fact, today (1/28),you can get it for free- https://www.amazon.com/dp/B078HRSNZ1 . Thanks for your support.

Saturday Night's Main Event #17- Baltimore Beatings!

We begin with Jake “The Snake” Roberts making out with his wife, Cheryl. “Ravishing” Rick Rude says the night will.end with Damian wrapped around Jake”s neck, and Cheryl around his. Ooooh. Big Boss Man says “you have the right to feel pain. If you wish to have an attorney present, I’ll hurt him too!” The Hart Foundation wants to win the tag titles tonight, this time without Jimmy Hart. Demolition says there won't be anything for the Harts to reconstruct. Hulk Hogan is going to have Elizabeth present, to knock King Haku off of his throne.

From the Baltimore Arena, it's the fifth season premiere. They say Haku is defending the crown against Hogan. I’m holding them to that. First, we see the events leading up to Roberts-Rude.

Gene asks why would Rude want to face Roberts. He says Roberts and Damian couldn't win a three-legged race. Oh snap.

Gene says Rude is wearing the Cheryl tights. Jake says not for long. “Rude and his tights will go down.” Cheryl also has a fig leaf for Rude.

Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts- Another Mania IV tourney rematch. And what a high bar they set there. They lock up to start and roll down the ropes. Rude shoulders him in the corner, but Jake hits a kneelift. Jake getsa wristlock. Rude tried to escape but Jake pulls him back in. Rude leapfrogs but gets hit low. Jake signals for the DDT, but Rude bails. Rude rakes the eyes coming back in. Jake misses his short arm clothesline, and Rude gets his own. Rude continues to work him over, and gestures at Cheryl. Jake clotheslines him when he is distracted, and punches him down. Jake gives him a gutbuster, and surfboards Rude so Cheryl can slap him. The ref ejects Cheryl and they head to a break, of course. Back, and Rude sends Jake into the post, then rams his arm into it. Jake pounds away back in, and gibes him a baaack bodydrop. He goes for tye DDt but gets backdropped. Rude does a fistdrop, and gets two on a sloppy cover. Jake bites his arm to get out of an armbar, and gets the DDT. He pulls Rude’s tights off instead of covering, and Heenan stomps away for the DQ. *** He also waved for Andre to come in, and he headbutts Jake to the floor. Jake then grabs Damian. Andre is afraid of the snake and begs off, but Jake.eventually throws Damian on the giant, Andre clutches his chest, and appears passed out. I just feel bad for the guy seeing this again. Heenan pounds on Andre’s chest and yells for help.

After the break officials are helping Andre get back up. He rolls out of the ring, bowling down one jabroni in the process. It unfortunately wasn't Pat Patterson, who was there, too. Heenan hugs the big man on the outside in a touching moment.

Gene talks to the Hart Foundation about their match with Demolition. They are sick of Jimmy "Mouth of the South" Hart, who will be with Demolition and Mr. Fuji tonight.

Jesse talks to the champs. Hart wants to prove the Harts are nothing without him. Ax says they'll be Conservatives and let the Harts be Liberals; "Bleeding-heart Liberals," Smash ads. It was a question from Jesse, what do you expect? He wanted to be Trump's running mate!

WWF tag team championship, Hart Foundation vs. Demolition (c)- Anvil starts with Ax. They slug it out to begin, but the Demos doubleteam in the corner. Smash can't suplex the Anvil, and he gets two off of that. Now the Harts doubleteam Smash, and Bret dropkicks him. He drops his elbow from the second rope for two. Bret started twisting Smash's arm, only to get clotheslined. Bret takes his patented sternum bump, and gets ruammed into Smash's boot in the corner. Anvil tries to come in, and Hart gets doubleteamed as a result. Fuji also chokes him with his cane. Smash snapmares him, and gets a chinlock. Ax gets the tag. Smash tags Ax, doubleteam Hart. Smash in for some clubberin'. He keeps working Bret over, and chokes him on the top. Smash misses a clothesline, Bret gets his own. Bret tags Anvil, who goes wild on the Demos. He punches Smash, dropkicks Ax then one for Smash, and a forearm and powerslam for the future Repo Man. Ax breaks up a pin, and all four in. The Demos get whipped together, Bret hits Fuji, Anvil grabs Jimmy, the Rougeaus run in and give Smash the megaphone, and he whacks Anvil with it for the pin. **¾.

We see footage of old King Harley Race missing a headbutt to a table against Hogan back in March. Haku is out for revenge. That's some impressive retconning, since Race wrestled.after that and Race even came for revenge against Haku a couple of months after this. They get Gene to bow indirectly.

King Haku vs. Hulk Hogan- Gene asks Hulk about his physical condition after his beating from the Big Bossman. He’s battered and bruised, but he's gonna knock him off his throne. He also has Elizabeth, “on loan from his Megapowers partner.” Mmm-hmm. Jesse’s not buying that one, either. Haku attacks as Hogan gets patted down. Chops aplenty, and he bites Hulk’s nose. Hulk begins the Hulk Up sequence, and Haku bails. Hulk rakes his back, and gets a clothesline and bootrakes his eyes. Heenan grabs his ankle, and Haku attacks Hulk coming back in. Haku chokes the Hulkster on the mat, and rakes his face. He works a nerve hold but Hogan Hulks Up again. An eyerake stops that, Hogan Irish whips Haku, but the Islander chops Hogan to the head and thrust kicks him out of the ring. Impressive. Heenan taunts Hogan outside, while Liz yells "c'mon ref!' Haku jumps off with a chop, but hits Heenan instead. Hogan goes back in and is now wearing the crown. That reminds me of Norm McDonald as Burt Reynolds on SNL.  So of course they go to a break with Heenan being helped to the back. When they return Haku and Hogan tie up like it's  a new match, and Hogan pummels him the corner. He whips Haku to the buckles, but the King comes out with a clothesline. He drops a headbutt on Hogan, and stomps him. Haku gets a suplex for two. More Up Hulking, big boot, legdrop FTW. *3/4. I now hate the SNME match formula as much as I do Raw's. I was so ready for this match to end before they did the commercial break reset. Hulky poses, and Liz even cups her ear. Where is the Macho Man during all of this?

Oh God, Dino Bravo is being interviewed by Mean Gene. He's just the worst.

Dino Bravo vs. Ken Patera- I just watched a Bravo match in the last hour, at WMV vs. Garvin. Let's get this over with. Patera says the stupid "America- Love it or Leave it" line that contradicts all of our supposed freedoms here. Sigh. They run into each other, and Patera clotheslines him and gives forearm shots.  Patera with a baaaack bodydrop, and a body slam. Bravo headbutts him in the gut, and chops him in the corner. Patera gets rammed into the top buckle, and chokes him. Patera reverses an Irish whip, and punches Bravo in the corner. Patera with a snapmare and slam. After a shoulderblock he goes for the full nelson, which I didn't think he was using at this point. Patera charges into a boot. Bravo gets a reverse atomic drop, and the side slam gets the duke. * I would have gone a point higher if Patera swung him around in the full nelson. Hell, I may have give this five star for that.

Gene talks to Slick and the Boss Man. Gene says he makes Harry Carey look like Regis Philbin. I don't know what that means.

Big Boss Man vs. Jim Powers- This can't go long, judging by the timer. Boss Man hammers away on Powers, who goes between his legs but gets backed into the corner. Boss Man splashes him in the corner, and gets a kneelift. BBM headbutts him, and raises his arms to show his sweat stains. He does the rope straddle splash that Jericho used, and chops Powers in the throat. Boss Man gets a bearhug,  and chokes Powers on the middle rope. Boss Man misses a clothesline and Powers gets two dropkicks, but BBM uses his finisher when he comes off of the ropes. 3/4* He cuffs powers to the middle rope, and whacks him with the nightstick. Paul Roma said Powers was a drunk, but this is a bit much.

Gene talks to Hogan about the beating BBM gave him on the Brother Love Show. Wow, Hulk even says the name Jim Powers. He didn't care enough to go help the kid, of course.

Ventura talks to Andre and Bobby. Ventura asks Andre if he's afraid of snakes. Andre grabs him by the shirt collar, and says don't say that word.

Saturday Night's Main Event #16

I watched this show while sleeping over at our friends the Ludwigs' house when it aired when I was a kid. I believe my brother was also there, hanging out with the two older boys. Yep.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan says it's spring cleaning time in the WWF. Bobby "The Brain" Heenan says when you wrestle one member of the Heenan Family, you're wrestling them all. Slick says call the police; they were robbed at Wrestlemania IV. "Macho Man" Randy Savage says the Madness will surround the One Man Gang. 

From Springfield, Mass. We see footage of Duggan walloping Andre with his 2x4 when the Giant was choking him. 

"Mean" Gene Okerlund with Hercules, Heenan and Andre. Bobby says Jigsaw Jim won't get away with hitting Andre. The Giant bellows out a good "Hooooo!"

Hercules vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan- Gene talks to Duggan. He says Herc is a yo yo at the bottom of Heenan's chain. Duggan reminds us Andre cost him the WWF title at WMIV. I'm impressed they acknowledged that; today's WWE never would. Ventura says Duggan sounds like a "wounded water buffalo in heat." They lock up , then Duggan reverses an attempted ramming of his head to the turnbuckles. Herc tries an Irish whip, but gets clotheslined. Herc takes a breather. Duggan drags him back in by the hair, and flips him back inside. Duggan hits a baaaack bodydrop, but misses a kneedrop. He works over the knee until Duggan tries a charge, which he misses. Herc chokes him on the middle rope, and stops a Duggan comeback by tossing him outside. Back in Herc hits a back elbow. Heenan cheapshots duggan while he's laying on the apron, so Duggan grabs the 2x4, chasing Heenan who does a spectacular bump to the floor. Herc jumps Duggan as he returns the board. Herc locks in a bearhug, Duggan fights out but Herc hits a flying knee. More rope-assisted choking. Duggan hits a knee off the ropes and hits an axehandle. He punches Herc in the corner, and gets a hiptoss. Duggan goes into the three-point stance, hits the clothesline, but Heenan breaks up the pin. Andre then assaults Duggan as Herc holds him. The Ultimate Warrior then runs out, giving Duggan his board. I believe that's the Warrior's first SNME appearance. *1/4

We see Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake cutting Jimmy Hart's hair at WMIV. Gene talks to Hart and "Dangerous" Danny Davis, who has a bag of barber tools of his own. 

Danny Davis vs. Brutus Beefcake- Gene interviews the Barber. "All work and no place gives Brutus a dull blade," Beefcake says. Brutus proclaims it 2 for 1 night, and shows Gene the hair he cut off of Hart. Hart runs for cover upon Brutus' arrival.  Brutus and Davis lock up, and Beefcake shoves him down. Davis hits a forearm that Brutus no-sells. Beefcake musses up his hair, and rams him into the buckles. Brutus hiptosses Davis, who gets a cheap shot while the ref tries to separate them. Davis chokes Beefcake with the bottom rope, and Hart comes at Beefcake with the hedgeclippers. Brutus knees Davis in the jaw, and slams him. Hart pulls Davis to the floor, as he seems legitimately dazed from that knee. Brutus whips Davis and locks on the sleeper. Hart tried to interfere but the ref stopped him. Brutus wins *, and then cuts Davis' hair. He also spraypaints him, nWo style. Guess we know where they got that. Thank you, Disciple.  

YOU can watch footage here of Gang vs. Savage at WMIV; I'm not that far in my rewatch of that show. Gene talks to Slick and OMG. "We beat the dude once, we'll beat him again," Slick says.

WWF championship match, One Man Gang vs. Randy Savage (c)- Slick is shuckin' and jivin' on the way to the ring. Gene talks to the champ and Liz. Gene congratulates LIz on being the first woman to manage a WWF champion. Macho's tone toward Liz has really changed at this point. Gang backs Savage into the corners, and Savage uses elbow strikes. Gang tries a crossbody, and falls on top of Gang. OMG tosses him outside, but Savage jumps to the top and gets two off of a bodypress. Savage snaps Gang's throat on the top for two. Gang backs him into the corner and works him over. He picks Savage up by the throat, and chokes him with his boot. Slick then chokes Savage with his cane while Gang distracts the ref. Gang misses a clothesline, and Savage darts outside to chase Slick. When they go through the ring Gang drops an elbow on Savage to turn the tide. OMG Rakes Savage's face, as Slick taunts Savage. Gang misses a charge, and Savage elbows him in the head. Savage clotheslines him over the top, then goes up and drops the axehandle. Gang knocks a cameraman down with him. Savage goes up as the Gang regains the ring, but gets punched in the gut. Big bodyslam, and gang goes to the middle. He misses the 747 splash, and Slick goes after Liz. Savage turns his attention to Slick, and Gang hits him. OMG lifts Savage by the throat gain, but Slick whallops Gang with the cane by mistake. Savage drops the elbow for the win. **1/2. This was a sprited match, Gang held up his end, and made Savage look like a credible champion. And thankfully Hogan wasn't around to steal Savage's spotlight.

Gene talks to the British Bulldogs. Gene says Demolition wants to dip Matilda in chrome, and use her as a hood ornament. The Bulldogs asure him that won't happen.

Demolition vs. British Bulldogs- Ouch, this is even non-title. How the mighty had fallen, though they challenged at Wrestlefest that summer. Jesse interviews the Demos and Mr. Fuji. Matilda apparently be mounted on Fuji's Wineabago, and they'll take it down to the Grand Canyon. Smash and Davey start. Smash pounds on him, but Davey tags Dynamite, who clotheslines and headbutts Smash. Smash grabs the top rope but misses an elbow. Ax in, but Dynamite holds his arm for Davey to jump on. Dynamite back in, but Smash pounds on his back. Doubleteam, and Smash gets a backbreaker. Smash bearhugs Dynamite, who headbutts out of it. Ax gets the tag, and cuts off one for the Bulldogs. Demo doubleteams. Dynamite boots a charging Smash in the corner, and tags Davey Boy. He slams both Demos, and dropkicks Ax. Dynamite gets the tag, but Smash shoulderblocks him down. He heaves Dynamite outside, where Fuji puts the boots to him. The Dogs (with Matilda) chase Fuji to the back. Something, something, Fuji dog joke. I hope she eats him. The Demos also head back, but the refs stop them. You know, people diss how obvious the commercial break spots on Raw are these days, but these SNMEs overuse the "match stops for some reason as people head to the back" spot, too. So of course after the break the match is restarted.

Davey has the cane when they return and is hitting Ax with it. The bell rings, and they double clothesline Smash. Demos win by DQ. * I'm baffled by this whole segment.

Gene is with Superstar Graham and Don "The Rock" Muraco (yep; get used to it). Superstar is gonna fight fire with fire. 

Don “The Rock” Muraco vs. Ted Dibiase- Dibiase tells Gene he was robbed of the belt twice. “I am the champion.” Dibiase attacks as Muraco is distracted by Virgil. The Rock gets a backdrop and punches him down. He rams Dibiase’s head to the buckle, and Ted bails. Graham gives him lip outside. Thry lock up, and Rock shoulderblocked him down. Dibiase misses an elbowdrop and gets clotheslined. Powerslam by the Rock, but Virgil puts his foot on the rope. Graham menaces him after that. Dibiase gets a clothesline for two. Vertical suplex gets another near fall. Side suplex as well. Rock gets a Russisn legsweep coming off the ropes, and elbows him off the ropes. A powerslam gets two. He chops Dibiase in the throat, but when Dibiase begs off he gets sucker punched. Dibiase bodyslams him and gets the pin, even though Rock's foot is on the rope. *

Gene talks.to Savage. Macho Madness has momentum, while Dibiase is.going.to.be bankrupt.

Rick Rude vs. Koko B. Ware- Why is Rude’s music changed on the Network? Just baffling. And then after his promo it's normal again! Hey-Zeus. Rude pounds Koko, who is on the apron. Koko leapfrog, then a dropkick. Koko takes charge but gets cheap-shotted. Rude works his back and kidneys. Snap suplex. Rude drops a chop from the top rope, then chokes Koko on the bottom rope. Rude hits a dropkick, but misses a second. Baaack bodydrop but he misses a splash and clotheslines himself on the top rope. Rude awakening puts him away. *½

Vince and Jesse wrap things up over a couple of segments. This episode wasn't actively bad or offensive, though it featured to WMIV rematches and a couple of matches that were done several times in this era. The fact it took me a week to get through the show is more about me than anything else.