Instead of the usual promo-a-rama, Vince McMahon voices a package on the Ultimate Warrior and Hulk Hogan tag-teaming for the very first time.
Vince makes a timely-ish reference to Guns N' Roses while introducing Jesse. That had to be from Dick Ebersole or someone else.
"Mean" Gene Okerlund talks to "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan. We flash back to "Macho Man" Randy Savage beating Duggan to become King of the WWF. Duggan wants revenge for the people.
"Hacksaw" Jim Duggan vs. "Macho King" Randy Savage- Gene talks to Savage and Queen Sherri. He says Duggan and the people are peasants. You've gotta love seeing the king's throne carried out by jobbers. Duggan sneaks over and tips Savage out of his throne. Back in, Duggan rams his face to the buckle. He misses a charge and hits his head on the top buckle, but it of course has no effect on Duggan. Savage kicks Duggan off of the ropes, and finally a clothesline drops him. He chokes Duggan on the mat, and leaps over the top to elbow him in the throat. Duggan reverses an Irish whip for a clothesline, then hits another for two. Duggan gets an atomic drop, but gets distracted by Sherri. Savage then knocks him ot the floor with an axehandle, then drops one from the top rope to the floor. Savage goes up and hits an axehandle for two. Savage snaps his throat on the top, and leaps back in for two. Savage tries the Boss Man butt splash but misses. Duggan then misses an elbowdrop. Duggan backdrops Savage to the floor, but foolishly breks the count. Sherri then jumps up to the apron to break it again. On the floor, Duggan goes to clothesline Sherri but hits Savage. Commercial break, and Duggan slams Savage back in. He drops a knee but Sherri distracts the ref and it only gets two. Duggan punches him and Sherri puts Savage's foot on the bottom rope. Duggan clotheslines Savage twice, and punches him to the floor. Sherri rakes Duggan's back on the floor. He chases her, and catches her in the ring. Her skirt gets hiked up and Vince says "goodness." Savage hits an axehandle while Duggan socks him in the gut. Sherri distracts the ref, tosses Savage her purse, and Savage socks Duggan with it. This time, though, it only gets two. Duggan gets a small package for a near fall. Duggan rams Savage's head to the buckle, and atomic drops him. Duggan hits two clotheslines, and sets up for the big one. The three-point stance sends Savage to the floor. When Duggan goes to suplex him back in, Sherri trips Duggan and Savage retains the crown. **1/2. That was one of the better Duggan matches I've seen.
Jesse knows there's a problem with Hogan and the Warrior. Conversely, he is with Brains and Brawn (Perfect and Genius). Genius says Hogan has a partner even stupider than he is, so he's going to lose again.
Mr. Perfect/The Genius vs. Hulk Hogan/The Ultimate Warrior- We see a clip of Hogan and Warrior's battle during the 1990 Royal Rumble. Hulk tells Gene they almost tore the building down when they fought. Now they are teamed as one, however. Perfect and Hulk start out, and Hogan shoves him to the corner. Perfect then climbs out to the apron. Back in, Hulk hiptosses, then slams Perfect and Genius in succession. The heels regroup outside, and Hogan tags Warrior. Helwig runs outside knocks their noggins, and rams them to the apron. Back in, he shoulderblocks Genius, and flips Perfect over the top rope. He then whips the heels into each other, and clotheslines Perfect over the top rope. Warrior then tags Hogan. He and Hennig lock up, and Hennig fires away in the corner. Hulk reverses a whip and hits a back elbow in the corner, sending Perfect to the floor. Hogan then whips Hennig into the post. Genius grabs his scroll to draft a strategy, as Hogan rams Perfect's head into the top buckle. Hogan hits a clothesline, and rams his head again. Perfect is overselling everything, so I hope there's going to be a heat segment at some point here. Hogan body slams perfect and drops elbows. He then mounts Hennig for punches. Hogan big-boots Hennig to the floor, and the Genius gives him the scroll. Hennig then whallops Hogan with it. What a strategy! Hennig then tries a chairshot, but hits the post. Back in, he kicks and boot-rakes Hogan, but Hulk gets a small package. Hennig chops away, and hits a forearm. Hennig does his neck-snap thing, and tags Genius. Poffo neck-snaps him off of the top rope, and holds Hulk for a Hennig axehandle. He forearms Hogan from a camel clutch position. Perfect measures Hogan with shots, and Now We're Going to See the Perfect Plex. Hennig actually stops the count, and tags in the Genius. Poffo goes for a moonsault but hits knees, and then Hennig leaps off of the top into a boot. Hogan then tags Warrior, who runs wild on the Genius. Perfect comes in and takes a punch and kneelift. Warrior clotheslines Poffo, then gives him the gorilla press/splash combo. Hogan blind tagged Warrior, and finished Poffo with the legdrop. ** Perfect then knocks Hogan to the floor, and Warrior fights with the two heels. He hits a clothesline on Perfect, then clotheslines Hogan, clearly on accident. Hogan reacts as well to this as you would expect. The two bulls butt heads in a visual that was used in the lead-up to their Wrestlemania VI match.
We see Jake "The Snake" Roberts taking custody of Ted Dibiase's Million Dollar belt. Jake is coy when Gene asks where the belt currently is.
Jimmy Hart tells Jesse they can't worry about what's in the bag.
Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs. Greg "The Hammer" Valentine- Jake empties the bag, and the belt indeed is in it with Damian. Hammer armdrags Jake twice. Jake takes him down and goes for the DDT, but Hammer slips out. Hart grabs Jake's ankle, and Hammer takes advantage. Valentine whips Jake into the buckles on both sides. Valentine drops the hammer for two. He punches away, and an elbow gets two. Valentine drops a knee to Jake's back, and gets another two. Jake punches his way to his feet, and rams Greg into the buckles. He punches the Hammer down. A short-arm clothesline sets up the DDT, but Hammer backdrops out of it. Valentine misses an elbowdrop, but Jake misses a kneelift and hits the buckles. Hammer goes for the leglock, gets kicked into Jimmy, and Jake hits the DDT. Dibiase and Virgil come in and work Jake over, though. Virgil grabs the bag, but Jake punches them both down. He chases them away with Damian. I think it was a DQ, and **.
Jesse talks to Heenan and "Ravishing" Rick Rude. Heenan says I thought you were going to say "accompanied by a piano" when Jesse said Dusty Rhodes will be accompanied by Sapphire.
Dusty Rhodes vs. "Ravishing" Rick Rude- No idea why they can't use Rude's real theme on the Network. Gene talks to Dusty and Sapphire. Rude said he could have her at the snap of his fingers. I think she said he's nothing compared to my Dusty; I listened twice but I'm not sure. The disrespect of women has got to be through, basically. Rude pounds away on Dusty to start. Rude whips Dusty but he reverses and sends Rude back-first to the buckle. He drops an elbow and tosses Rude to the floor, and rams Rude's back into the apron. Back in, Rude tries a slam but further hurts his back. Dusty bionic elbows Rude, and mocks Rude's wobbly-legged selling. Another elbow drops the Ravishing one. Rude begs off and Dusty shoulderblocks him in the corner. Dusty necksnaps Rude, but misses a big elbow. Rude necksnaps Dusty himself, and grabs a headlock. Heenan goes over and tells Sapphire to shut up, while Dusty backdrops Rude. Dusty goes out to protect her, but Rude attacks him. The ref comes out and ejects Heenan and Sapphire, as we head to a break. We return with Rude kneeing Dusty to the back, knocking him out of the ring. He posts the Dream. Rude can't gyrate, though. Rude works on Dusty's elbow. Sapphire then takes a seat at ringside. Dusty headbutts him, but Rude rakes his face. Jesse mentions the Main Event show with Mike Tyson Feb. 23. Rude and Dusty knock heads and hit the mat. Rude gets hit in the belly, and Dusty knees his hamstring before attempting a figure four. Rude gets out and snaps his neck. Rhodes Hulks Up as Jesse yells to Rude "hit him in the gut!" Rude boots Dusty on a backdrop attempt. Sapphire gyrates at Rude, so he goes outside. Dusty follows him and they brawl down the aisle. Double countout. *3/4. Dusty and Sapphire dance back in the ring.
Gene talks to Earthquake, Jimmy Hart and Dino Bravo. Everyone but Hart in the next match are Canadians.
Dino Bravo vs. Ronnie Garvin- Dino knees him in the gut and pounds away. Dino misses a clothesline and gets chopped. Garvin grabs a headlock, but gets tossed to the floor. Quake rams him into the apron and tosses him back in. Bravo slams Garvin and drops an elbow for two. Dino suplexes him for two. Bravo kicks his head and punches Garvin down. Bravo grabs the rope to block a rollup, and misses elbow drops on Garvin. Ronnie punches and chops Bravo, and gets a baaaack bodydrop. Garvin flips Hart in and tosses him to Quake. Garvin Stomp commences, and Ronnie stomps Quake's hand. Dion rams him to the top buckle and tosses him out. Ronnie hits the top for a flying bodypress, but Dino rolls through from the win. *1/2. Garvin attacks Dino after the bell, Dino slams him and Quake butt splashes him. Quake hits an aftershock. Garvin gets stretchered out.
Jeese interviews Randy Savage about the Main Event match with Hogan; Mike Tyson as the referee. There'll be no excuse when Macho beats Hulk Hogan. God, it's fascinating to think about what this would've been like had it actually gone down. Chances are that Buster Douglas was just slotted right into Tyson's spot, but Hogan and Tyson in the ring together in 1990 would have been the Sportscenter moment Vince always wanted.
Gene talks to Hogan. Hogan said he was the lone survivor in his SurSer match; stood tall after No Hold Barred: The Match (no mention of Beefcake); won the Royal Rumble, but people were always like, when are you gonna beat the Macho King? Is this like a John Cena, "Until you beat me with Mike Tyson as the referee, you haven't done nothin', jack!" thing?
Vince and Jesse chat some more about Tyson. They seriously spent the last seven minutes of TV time hyping The Main Event and Tyson. Oh, what could have been...
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